ISCT by Dan Simon's Blog (86)

Do you try to move parties off their positions?

The latest blog entry at the Institute for the Study of Conflict Transformation's website says that positional bargaining is not the cause of destructive conflict, though it may be a symptom.  You can read that blog entry here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on February 18, 2014 at 9:52pm — No Comments

It Turns out Conflict has to do with Morality

The most recent blog entry at the Institute for the Study of Conflict Transformation, available here, explains how there is always a moral/ethical dimension to how we respond to conflict.  Guest blogger, Basia Solarz, serves as the Conflict Transformation Specialist for the Capital District Health Authority in Halifax, Nova Scotia (Canada).

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on January 26, 2014 at 5:58pm — No Comments

David, Goliath and Mediation

In my latest blog post, available here, I describe how Malcolm Gladwell's latest book applies to transformative mediation.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on January 13, 2014 at 11:55pm — No Comments

Is Conflict Always about the Interaction?

This new blog post, available here, challenges a belief held by many mediators.  Many mediators believe they can adjust their approach according to whether the interaction between the parties is important or not.  This blog argues that all conflict, regardless of the subject, is about interaction at its core. 

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on December 19, 2013 at 11:24pm — No Comments

Dusty Rhoades on Why Transformative Theory Matters

Guest blogger, Dusty Rhoades, discusses the importance of theory in mediation.  You can read the article here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on November 26, 2013 at 9:56pm — No Comments

A Transformative Interpretation of a Fight between Friends

In my latest blog post, available here, I revisit my previous post, in which I told about a fight I had with a friend. In this post I discuss how the transformative theory of conflict provides helpful insight into what happened. 

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on October 27, 2013 at 11:07pm — No Comments

It's not about the Money! I Mean it!

When I practiced law, the conventional wisdom among the lawyers I knew was that when people say "it's not about the money", it's actually about the money.  Or if it IS a matter of principle, then our job as lawyers was to let them know that their principles would not be vindicated by the legal system, but that maybe we could get them some money.  Since I've become a transformative mediator, I now assume that conflicts are about our desire for autonomy and our expectations about how our…

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Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on October 3, 2013 at 5:33pm — No Comments

Autonomy Doesn't Just Mean No Judge

In my latest blog entry, available here, I discuss how conflict is characterized by a sense of loss of autonomy.  The beauty of mediation is that, if it's done right, it can return a sense of autonomy to the parties.  Unfortunately, mediation is often conducted in a way that keeps parties feeling powerless.  The transformative approach provides guidance on how to keep party autonomy…

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Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on September 11, 2013 at 7:43pm — No Comments

Co-Mediating with a Problem-Solver

In my latest blog entry, available here, I describe a co-mediation I did with a co-mediator who was accustomed to leading the parties down a problem-solving path.  This particular co-mediator was open to sitting back and watching what happened when I simply supported the conversation.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on August 22, 2013 at 6:20pm — No Comments

What About Mediation Clients Who Are Evil?

Tough questions about human nature arose after a recent training by Baruch Bush and Joe Folger.  In my latest blog post, I tried to answer those questions consistently with transformative theory.  You can read it here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on July 25, 2013 at 12:38pm — 1 Comment

I Used to Love my Flipchart

Divorce mediators often get a sense of security from having a flipchart to turn to.  It gives a sense of order and gives the mediator a sense of control.  In my latest blog entry,which you can read here, I talk about how I've let go of my attachment to the flipchart.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on July 5, 2013 at 2:05pm — No Comments

Transformative Mediation Invades Europe

Last week in Rome, over 100 mediators met to discuss how to keep self-determination central in mediation.  Read more about it here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 18, 2013 at 8:20pm — No Comments

Finally! How to Handle OUR OWN Conflicts, from the Transformative Perspective

Transformative theory has, until now, been applied mostly to the question of how mediators can be most helpful.  How those principles applied to dealing with one's own conflicts was not so clear.  Now, Folger and Bush, the authors of The Promise of Mediation, have conducted a training on this question, and they seem to have nailed it!  …

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Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 9, 2013 at 6:19am — No Comments

Surprise Ending to a Parenting Mediation

In my latest blog entry, available here, I tell the story of a parenting mediation.  The story illustrates why we mediators have no business trying to move parties toward an agreement.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 1, 2013 at 10:35pm — No Comments

Two Guys Fight on a Plane

In my latest blog post, I describe a conflict I saw arise on near me on a plane.  It demonstrated many of the principles of the transformative theory of conflict.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on April 26, 2013 at 12:28am — No Comments

Transformative Mediation Conference in Rome in June

If you're in Europe this June, swing by the transformative mediation conference organized by Quadra.  More information available here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on March 31, 2013 at 11:29pm — No Comments

The Antidote to Community Mediation Centers' Plights?

Michelle Zaremba, coordinator of the Dayton Mediation Center, believes that her center's commitment to the transformative approach is central to their success.  My latest blog post, which you can see here, includes comments form Michelle, as well as her presentation to the City Commissioners of Dayton.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on March 22, 2013 at 8:40pm — No Comments

More About How Transformative Mediation is Done

In this second part of a two part blog entry, I describe how trainings in transformative mediation ago.  You can read the blog entry here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on February 26, 2013 at 2:50pm — No Comments

The World's Next Top Model (of Mediation)

In the blog entry linked here, I describe how challenging it is to embrace the transformative perspective; and I try to explain how different that perspective is from where I started.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on February 15, 2013 at 1:11pm — No Comments

See Video of a Transformative Mediation

Virtual Mediation Lab (VML) helps mediators practice their craft.  I recently had the pleasure of conducting a mediation by Skype with the help of Giuseppe Leone and his VML.   You can read about it and see the video here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on January 30, 2013 at 12:47pm — No Comments

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