ISCT by Dan Simon's Blog (86)

Why Do Social Media Conversations Get Ugly?

The latest blog entry explains why transformative mediation sessions are different from online conversations. Read it here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on February 6, 2017 at 9:25pm — No Comments

Mediation Shouldn't Try to Eliminate or Disregard Differences

Differences matter to us.  Mediators should not try to push past those differences.  Read the blog here:

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on January 14, 2017 at 1:10pm — No Comments

The Same Transaction Can Feel Very Different, Depending on the Vibes

Humans like to give gifts to each other.  Why is that tendency assumed to be out of the question, once conflict arises.  What if we can get back to being our normal, generous selves, even toward the person we've been fighting with?  Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on December 29, 2016 at 12:11pm — No Comments

What to do about Trump

The election of Donald Trump raises important questions.  What does transformative theory say about how we should respond?  Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on November 29, 2016 at 3:17pm — No Comments

Wikipedia Does Conflict Well

There's a lot of ugly conflict on the internet. Wikipedia knows how to handle conflict constructively.  Read the blog about it here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on October 16, 2016 at 11:28pm — No Comments

Miscommunication is a Symptom of Conflict

In the latest blog entry, which you can read here,  I discuss how miscommunication happens once the destructive conflict cycle has started. That's why transformative mediation is so powerful.  It can help clear up communication in the midst of conflict.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on August 16, 2016 at 1:09am — No Comments

Name-calling is Underrated

Many mediators believe it's helpful to set ground rules for their sessions.  One of the most popular rules is "no name-calling".  That's a mistake. Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 21, 2016 at 1:46am — No Comments

What does "Trust the Process" mean?

The expression "trust the process" comes up a lot.  But what process are we talking about?  In this blog, I distinguish between the process that can be trusted, and the procedures that are used as manipulative tactics.  You can read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 4, 2016 at 3:16pm — No Comments

Prince's Death Reminds me of Universal Values

Strength and compassion are universal human values. The transformative theory of conflict assumes that our capacity to live up to those values is diminished during conflict's worst moments.  The reason Prince was so beloved was his embodiment of those values. Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on April 27, 2016 at 11:26pm — No Comments

Shocking! Apologies help?

It's hard to believe, but legal culture still believes the best strategy is to defend and deny.  So apparently it's newsworthy that hospitals save money when doctors apologize for their mistakes.  Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on April 2, 2016 at 11:17pm — No Comments

Is there a shortcut to Wisdom?

I think so.  I think studying transformative mediation at least teaches you how to behave wisely.  Read the blog here. 

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on March 1, 2016 at 2:35pm — No Comments

What's the Deal with Evaluative Mediation?

It's outrageous that "evaluative mediation" is still called mediation, isn't it?  Here's a blog about 5 of the fundamental problems with it.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on February 4, 2016 at 7:14pm — No Comments

Divorce Mediation Has Gotten More Popular but Worse

Public awareness of mediation as an option for divorce has grown in recent years.  Unfortunately, as awareness has grown, mediation practices have become more legalistic and less about party self-determination.  Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on December 21, 2015 at 5:04pm — No Comments

Transformative Theory Makes People Like Me

The transformative theory of conflict informs not only my mediation but the way I interact with everyone.  You can read the article here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on December 4, 2015 at 8:59pm — No Comments

Enlightened Medical Approaches Run Parallel to Transformative Mediation.

In Atul Gawande's latest book, Being Mortal, he bemoans the over-medicalization of death.  We who help with conflict can learn something from him. Read the blog here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on October 20, 2015 at 10:37pm — No Comments

Transformative Mediation Conference Coming to Dayton, Ohio in May

Read all about the upcoming transformative mediation conference in Dayton, OH.  It's the first time since 2008 that such a conference has happened in the USA.  Read about it here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on September 18, 2015 at 2:47pm — No Comments

Empowerment and Recognition Sweep the Nation

The core concepts of the transformative theory of conflict, which are empowerment and recognition, work within people, between people and throughout large populations.  The progress of marriage equality in the USA provides an example of how empowerment and recognition can affect tens of millions of people.  Read the whole blog entry here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 28, 2015 at 11:48pm — No Comments

"Who does he think he is?" and Other Things Mediation Clients Say

The transformative theory of conflict suggests that parties are generally struggling to regain a state of strength and responsiveness.  This blog entry gives some examples of how some statements by parties might be interpreted within the transformative framework.  You can read the article here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on June 11, 2015 at 12:57am — No Comments

Mediators Don't Like Being Told What to Do Either

We transformative mediators sometimes offend other mediators.  We're so convinced that we provide a purer form of self-determination; and we complain about mediators who are manipulative or pushy.  It's understandable that those other mediators don't like that.   Read the full article here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on May 23, 2015 at 7:59am — No Comments

Kent State Incident Helps Create Mediator

Janet Mueller explains the significance to her of May the Fourth.  The violence that day led to the existence of an academic program that set her on the path to becoming a mediator.  You can read her post here.

Added by ISCT by Dan Simon on May 6, 2015 at 10:08am — No Comments

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