Merry Christmas Eve readers! For those of you who celebrate Christmas, I hope you have a wonderful holiday. And, for those who celebrate another holiday, I hope you’re enjoying the day-off from work!

I thought I would write a post about mindset during the holidays because so many of us will be surrounded by family and friends, some of whom may instigate conflict for no apparent reason. I was inspired to write about this because a dear friend of mine is planning a vacation with her family (husband and two children), part of which will be to visit her in-laws.

She’s already dreading it. Apparently, Grandma and Grandpa are very difficult to get along with, ignore/annoy the grandchildren, and verbally abuse her husband. So, you can imagine her anxiety, as the days get closer to the visit.

My advice? Change your mindset. If you’re already feeling anxious about what “might” happen, you’re already setting yourself up for conflict and/or disappointment. Since her last visit, perhaps Grandma and Grandpa have resolved their own issues. Or, maybe they’ve come to understand how precious time with their grandchildren is. Maybe they’ve even learned how to speak to others respectfully.

Approaching the visit with a “clean slate” doesn’t mean forgetting your boundaries. If there really is abusive behavior, no one should be subjected to it. But, isn’t it better to NOT look for problems before they even begin?

So, here’s my Christmas wish for her (and all of you if you have similar situations): change your mindset and don’t recreate old conflicts just because you anticipate them. Instead, approach you old foes with a new mindset, and see if you can tell the difference!


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