What's Happening In Conflict Resolution [01.26.15]

"What's Happening in Conflict Resolution" is a weekly round up of the all the ADR news, jobs, events and more. Check it out each week and view past versions [HERE].

A reminder on the importance of empathy and practicing it via enjoymediation.com/CrisisNegotiator blog
EMPATHY*

"Empathy should not be confused with sympathy, 
which indicates pity. In crisis intervention, 
the goal is not to feel sorry for the person in crisis, but to 
establish a relationship through effective communication whereby positive steps can be taken toward
resolving the crisis in a collaborative fashion."
*From: Vecchi, G.M. (2009). Conflict & crisis communication: the behavioral influence stairway model and suicide intervention. Annals of the American Psychotherapy Association, 12, 32-29.

Evaluation has no Place in Mediation

If mediation is supposed to be about self-determination, where does evaluation fit in?  It doesn't.

Dan Simon- “Based on my years of experience as a litigator and as a judge, I’d say your latest positions are both within the reasonable range for this case. I’d say the plaintiff’s demand of $200,000 is on the high side of that range; and I’d say the defendant’s offer of $100,000 is on the low side of that range. So I’d say that any settlement you arrive at now, between those numbers, would be a good deal for both sides, considering the costs and uncertainty of continued litigation.”

This is the sort of thing an evaluative mediator says to parties. This mediator was talking to both parties – it would be more common to talk to each side separately – in that situation she could say to the defendant “I think $100,000 is low and won’t be quite enough to settle the case” – and she could say to the plaintiff “I think $200,000 is high and I don’t think you’ll get that in this case.” Thus, the evaluative mediator can nudge both sides toward a compromise settlement. And that’s her job, right?

Read more at Dan's blog [HERE]

Christina ParkIntroverts often hesitate to negotiate for what they truly want – whether it’s a higher salary or a better business deal. But with a little courage and practice, introverts can excel in negotiations.

… Here are eight tried-and-true negotiation tips.

1.  Ask for it.

Often, simply asking for what you want is half the battle. Gather your courage, do your research (more on that below), and be prepared to seize the opportunity. A Harvard Business Review study found that 57% of male MBA graduates from Carnegie Mellon tried to negotiate their initial salary offer. By comparison, only 7% of female graduates from the same program tried to bargain for more. The result? The male MBAs’ salaries were almost 7.6% higher on average. The takeaway is simple – when the timing is right, jump in and ask for it. If you don’t ask, you’ll never know.

5.  Ask open-ended questions.

Read more from Forbes.com [HERE].

15 Tips for Instilling Leadership Skills in Children

JOHN RAMPTON
Entrepreneur.com

Many leaders also serve as parents, happily balancing a daily workload with ball games and family dinners. Along the way, most of these leader-parents also realize the influence they have over young minds. Today’s children are tomorrow’s leaders, especially if those children have parents who are leaders.

While leadership skills can come naturally, children learn lessons along the way that significantly impacts them later in life. The right words at the right time can make all the difference.

Here are 15 great tips to help you instill the right skills in the future leaders in your life.

1. Set a good example.

3. Emphasize perseverance.

The best leaders learn to handle failure as gracefully as they handle success. It’s important to expose future leaders to disappointment rather than protecting them from it. Children need to learn to handle the loss and move forward when the other team wins or someone else is elected class president.

4. Build negotiation skills.

6. Practice confident communication.

Read the full list [HERE]

A growing alternative to criminal trials: Mediation

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